Family Survives Through Bankruptcy

Written by Meg Brown

Thursday, 20 August 2009 05:23

by MegBrown

"Jackie couldn't stand it. Her nine and ten year olds were always begging her to play Monopoly with them. "It was easy enough to come up with excuses they could accept, like "I'm too busy right now" or "If I don't cook dinner, nobody gets to eat around here," she says. The truth of the matter was far more complex.

"I would get a twist in my gut whenever I walked by their game table and saw the white backs of property title cards, the word "Mortgage" leaping off them in bold letters. There was no way on earth I could relax playing a game where I had to watch my kids cope with debt. I seriously considered banning the game from the house." Jackie and her husband, Jim, had a lot on their plate and tensions were running high. Their fledgling retail business was not paying the bills and yet demanded a hundred percent of both partners' time. Eventually everything from back to school supplies to grocery bills made it onto personal credit cards, all in the hope that "next month we'll turn a corner".

When the business finally did die its bitter death and the couple had returned to working for other companies, their debt burden was enormous. It would be all they could do to tread water for years to come. Jackie was kept awake at night with a recurring dread: "My biggest fear was having to tell the kids that they were going to lose their home."

The delicate thread of maintaining minimum payments on maxed out revolving credit was broken the night Jim fell at work on his shift and ended up in the hospital for several days with a head injury. Jackie winces when she recalls the arrival of the first hospital bill in the mail. They hadn't been able to afford medical insurance for quite some time.

Jackie and Jim are not dumb people. Jackie with a business degree and Jim with his family history filled with self-employment, they both knew they were taking risks when starting their own business. They were brimming with energy and great ideas, a little low on capital but high on entrepreneurial spirit. They were convinced that combining these strengths with lots of hard work would bear fruit. They did what every whole-hearted entrepreneur does: They went for broke into a world where they could not possibly control all the circumstances. All the while the word "bankruptcy" remained so vile, neither of them ever breathed it.

Slowly the cracks revealed themselves and Jackie recognized that both she and Jim were slipping into depression and dysfunction that would soon not permit them to properly look after their two most precious assets, their two young children. "You are willing to do things for your children that you never before thought possible," Jackie explains. After weeks of internal wrangling, she went online and found a well recommended bankruptcy attorney.

Prepared with a scrupulously detailed financial statement, Jackie went into her first meeting with the attorney. What she was unprepared for was the torrent of emotion that came tumbling out when she relayed her saga to him. The numbness of past months were transformed in those few minutes. "I stupidly apologized to him (the attorney) over and over again for our situation, as though I believed it was a deliberate act of folly on our part - like we should have seen it coming down the pike. Then I apologized for dumping on him like he was my therapist or something." As for therapy, the attorney did hand her a tissue box before saying, "There is light at the end of the tunnel."

Jackie and Jim went over all their options from creditor negotiation to bankruptcy filing with their attorney before determining that Chapter 7 was the most healthy option in their case. Jim admitted that this was still the hardest thing he had yet done in his life. "Your self image is severely dented in this process. But when you measure that against no longer being able to function as a provider for your family or as a parent to your children, the choice becomes clear." When regarded as a last resource safety valve to keep stressed families from falling apart, bankruptcy law is properly used for its original intent.

Able to get a little sleep now that some of the mental adjustments have been made, Jackie will tell you that the bankruptcy process has not been completely painless. "Yes, there is hurt there. But it was the experience leading up to the filing, not the filing itself that was the nightmare." She is grateful that their attorney made it possible for them to keep their modest little house for the children's sake. She also knows that there is a lot of hard work and careful living ahead of them but that is nothing to fear. "Socrates said 'The unexamined life is not worth living'," Jackie tells me. "Looking back on experiences both good and bad are all part of examining and choosing well for a healthy future.

About the Author:

Meg Brown is a freelance writer and citizen concerned with the ongoing history of usury in our nation. Through her research, she has noted the important societal role of careful bankruptcy legal minds such as her neighborhood's trusted bankruptcy attorney. Readers are invited to check out the insights at Straight Talk from a SC Bankruptcy Lawyer.